November 27, 2010

All the love in loving your body

I've been reading/listening to blogs/vlogs about body acceptance and it kinda gets me to the core.

I'm a severely cynical person. I don't come across bubbly or happy. But I am relatively. I'm mellow to the point of death, and reserved more than that. I DO get excited, but about very little. I look forward to things, I just don't show it. My point is, my personality (to me) doesn't attract people to me. If you want to get to know me, usually you have to wade through my bullshit.
Not to say I'm not worth getting to know. I'm fiercely loyal and would willingly give you the shirt off my back and walk around naked if you needed it.

That being said. I'm following these blogs (see my ever growing links section) and am so inspired by the passion of these women. They want to change the world, and they are sure that they can. I hope they can. I just can't express that same excitement. And I'm jealous. This enthusiasm is contagious though. I find myself reading these  blogs for hours and getting emotionally involved.
I believe that this is the blossoming of a passion that I'm lacking in my life. Not that the passion hasn't presented itself, I just don't project it.

I also am learning that I'm harder on myself than I need to be. I was just remembering two of my teachers from my last school and both (in different semesters) told me that they enjoyed my work at the end of the semester. One even shook my hand. I have fans that have never met me. People want my work adorning their bodies forever. I'm reminded often that my work does touch people and is noticed by those who aren't forced by genetic ties to tell me that I'm good. I want to make their support worth it. I want to make the people that stand behind my work, proud. I want to always work hard to make people happy. AND learn not to bite off more than I can proverbially chew.

I'm excited to get my thesis underway because it's such a thoughtful project and I'm passionate about the process and how I'm portraying this topic.

I hope that I can represent the movement in a positive, loving light....

And learn to love and accept myself in the end.

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