I'll just leave this here

Not much in the research and facts to share for this blog post. Mostly photos of how things are going.

I started the large (and final) version of my doll last week. After sketching the face and patting myself on the shoulder because I was happy with what I had, I started inking it only to realize that the eye was NOT OK! Crossed, even.
When drawing facial features like eyes, even a slight mistake becomes GLARING and just not right. No matter how hard I tried to fix it, it just would work.

I had to start over. I handled it better than expected. There was no throwing stuff, and only minimal cussing.

It looks ok now, but when the ink started
flying, the eye started running.

I can say that I'm honestly very happy with how the new one came out. So much so that when I put the highlight in the eye, I started to cry. It's very rare that I'm that satisfied with my work. I think after the terrible afternoon I had and having to start over, it was a welcome relief to have magic happen.

Already the newer, prettier sister came out to play

So not only is this thesis process helping me learn to love my own body, it's also teaching me that I've grown considerably in the last several years. I can tell you that I wasn't like this years ago. If I was at the peak of my frustration, I would break things and scream. Much like a baby. Growth is magical. It shows in my work, too.

Only a peek for now. I don't want to share
the entire image until I have all of the girls done.

I also have a mockup done of my hourglass shaped doll. Note: my dolls do not look like their human models. This is done on purpose. While they WILL resemble them slightly, if you've modeled for me, you will probably recognize parts of yourself in the dolls (characteristics, personality, sense of humor, etc). The doll I used to represent me, does look like me, because it IS me.

Hourglass shape:

In pieces!

As much as I look at them, I still get creeped
out by looking at all the parts separately.

Your closeup, miss hourglass.

The mockup versions of the dolls help me visualize how the parts are going to go together for the larger versions. Because I want these to be pretty close to anatomically correct, I don't want to go from rough sketch to final and find out that the pose does not work. I'm used to making very illustrative dolls, anatomy didn't matter. I could "make it work". But I really appreciate having the little versions to work from.

While this lady may resemble the model to people
who know her, you shouldn't be able to flip through
my Facebook friends list and pick her out. I hope I captured
the "quirk".

We also had our midterm reviews this week. This event is for second semester seniors to get together with members of the community who work in illustration and design fields (I'm speaking purely for the illustration department, here). Each student has 45 minutes to present their thesis idea, sketches, and whatever finals that are complete to a 3-person panel (who don't know you, and have never seen your work and don't know a thing about your thesis).

I figured I'd wing it because somewhere in my brain, I have the ego of Donald Trump. I figured I could blow through my ideas and get to the questions.

WRONG. I lost my train of thought halfway through, and (in my mind) I couldn't describe what I thought was a very concise version of my thesis project (see right side of my blog).

Promo card for the midterm review panel to
take. I think I'll print some of these to keep
on hand and to give out at my oral.

Even though I felt like I rambled through something I'd tell my grandmother, my wobbly knees and sweat-soaked forehead (was it hot or just me?) I got some amazing feedback and the energy was out of sight. I was given some things to watch out for, things that I need to make sure to include, and some great support. My mentor popped in a couple of times and having her in the room really gave me a little spine that I needed. 

When it was over and I was clearing up my space, the department head came in and commented on my progress. See, I had him last semester for my Professional Practices class and I struggled through the first half of the semester while we were formulating our thesis ideas. I struggled with my concept, I struggled with assignments, I struggled to get my act together because I had to change my thesis idea after having it all planned out for two years. Needless to say, we had moments where it seemed he was talking and it wasn't sinking in. (We won't talk about the one time he high-fived me)

This is the first time he'd seen my thesis work this semester. We had a pleasant conversation about it and he seemed pleased, which sort of caught me off guard because honestly, I'm used to being a little intimidated by him. For a moment I felt like a peer, like what I was doing could even be considered professional. Well, especially since he held open my plastic bag while I put my sketches and presentation materials in it.

I haven't been able to read the summary and evaluation sheet from the review. I know that it's mostly positive, but I just can't bring myself to do it just yet.

Maybe tomorrow.